You'll notice that I've extorted some 'It's Happy Bunny' materials... You can check it out on the author's website: http://www.jimbenton.com/ and buy merchandise on http://www.blackjackinc.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPRODGROUP&ID=4&HS=1...

Let's focus on me.

Time: 9:31pm
Watching: Arrested Development.

Blogging. It's a pretty self-focused activity. Writing... about you and what you do and what you think.

You know what I didn't know? That chick on Arrested Development is dating Ellen Degeneres. Interesting. Simpson's was pretty funny... got a good chuckle at Moe saying: "Here Homer, have a frosty cold glass of forget-about-it." Also laughed ridiculously at the gay bar across the street called "The League of Extra-Horny Gentlemen". Hahaha. Speaking of which, men should date each other. Even straight men... they should have to date a guy before they graduate to dating women. This way they'd get a taste of how men can be to the people they date. You know, walk in our shoes. Oh boy. That was just a HUGE generalization. I realize this. But sometimes it's just so easy to lump all men into the same category. It just seems like there's some similarities that justify generalization. Not that there AREN'T exceptions to the rule, but nonetheless there IS a rule. Wow. I sound so prejudiced. Put any other group or ethnicity in place of 'men' in my comments and it doesn't bode well. Ah who gives a crap anyways... I'm just ranting.

I'm so jealous! My sister went to a conference in Florida recently. I'm not jealous about the weather, she said it was warmer in Calgary than Florida the whole time she was there! What I am jealous about is that she got to see a couple of people speak at this conference, which I realize normally happens at the things. However, the speaker that opened it was John Cleese. Yeah he's pretty famous and pretty funny, but I'm not green with envy over that. It was the person who closed the conference I would have loved to see. Who? Stephen Wright. He is so fricken hilarious. We saw him do his routine in Vegas years ago and it was great. Unfortunately we were soooo drunk that I forget most of it! Yikers. That was a bad night. Anyways, according to my sis, most people didn't know who he is. What the? He's that tall bald headed guy with the curly black shoulder length hair who speaks in monotone. He says things like... I picked up a hitch-hiker once. Told him to buckle up. Said I wanted to try something. I saw it in a cartoon once but I'm pretty sure I can do it.

He cracks me up. Here's a few more of his one-liners...

• Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
• When a man talks dirty to a woman, its sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 per minute.
• Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?
• Why do scientists call it research when looking for something new?
• Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
• Do married people live longer than single people or does it just seem longer?

Anyways, I can't believe that people don't know who the guy is. My sis said she laughed her ass off.

Man I'm so tired. We went out for my friend Kim's birthday last night. And we drank like we still go out every weekend. She was good and fubared. Completely munted. (Munted- Totally pissed/intoxicated. Really out of it due to drinking vast amounts of alcohol.) We had to have the cab pull over a couple of times. Poor girl. But she hardly ate a thing yesterday. And that is a guaranteed hurl-fest. She's pretty humiliated. She ain't no 18 year old. She ain't no rock star either. It was a fun night though. We all just acted like assholes on the dance floor and amused ourselves. Kim's friend was hilarious. He'd do a really tacky 80s type dance (robot-style or whatever it was) and then he'd act like he'd hurt his back real bad. Haha. Back to Kim... the irony was that she told a couple of stories about me earlier that night to her friends and explained that I was a "puker". Uh huh. Poetic. I wouldn't wish that on anyone though.

Me tired. Out.

"Hate is just a special type of love that we give to people who suck." 

snafu

My life is a SNAFU. It seems normal at first glance... but then it reveals itself as truly f'ed up. At least it's never boring. It's like that saying about Alberta's weather, "if you don't like the weather, just wait 5 minutes." If I don't like my life, just wait 5 minutes. Alternatively, if I like my life, just wait 5 minutes. Shit. I'm screwed.

totally random

• People with dreads wear HUGE toques.
• Why is it so hard to tell someone their breath stinks?
• My cat Cassie is a total lap slut.
• A day is not complete unless I've spilled something.
• Why is it so funny when someone falls down? God that cracks me up.
• If you can't laugh at yourself, you're in deep shit.
• How can a person be so smart, yet so dumb at the same time? (i.e. me)
• Why don't guys call when they either say they will or know they should? It would make life easier for everyone involved if they'd just buck up and dial.
• My cat Nay is so fat that she's just a black ball with huge eyes and stiletto heels for legs.
• Did you ever notice that the day after drinking, your I.Q. falls to half it's normal level?
• Road rage is totally fucked up. Get a life.
• My roommate said that if you can make a girl laugh you've already got her halfway to the bedroom. I'm sure most guys would like to know, what gets you the rest of the way there?
• Usted huele como el fondo de mi zapato. ANYTHING sounds romantic in Spanish.
• Why don't they just use red-colored liquid in those maxi-pad commercials? If they are going to be that graphic, then why stop there? Geez.
• I wonder how much snot you'd find under the driver's seat of people's cars.
• Why do men think it's ok to do gross things in public? This may include picking their noses, scratching their crotches, farting, horking, or sitting spread-eagled so everyone has a nice view of their package.
• Procrastination is just instant gratification.
• Masterbation... ditto.
• One of the rudest sensations is sitting on a toilet seat that someone has peed on. It's worse than falling into a toilet that someone has left the seat up on!
• Why are farts funny?
• Stephen Wright once said that he tried to keep an open mind but his brains kept falling out. Drinking will do the same thing.
• Can someone wake up dead?
• What is the point of having your weight on your driver's licence if it's way off anyways?
• Hand washing is the best way to prevent the spread of disease. JUST DO IT!!!
• If a guy ever asks if you've ever had "bigger"... do not, I repeat: DO NOT answer!
• If someone has really f'ed up dreams, what does that say about him/her?
• What's with Febreeze and all the air freshener products out there? If something stinks that bad, you've got problems man. Figure it out.
• Nothing blends into its surroundings better than a cordless phone that is ringing.
• Here's a good one to think about: When was the last time you did something for the first time?
• Hardcore porn is a huge huge business... there must be a LOT of sickos out there. Scary.
• What's with Telus and their ZILLIONS of televi$ion commercial$??? They suck. No amount of cute animal commercials will convince us otherwise.
• Did you ever notice the thing you can't find is always in the last place you look? (Actually for me it's sometimes in the first place I looked, but I don't find it until I look there for the 25th time. Not sure how that happens but it rotts me.)
• Why don't guys just throw out that underwear that's torn, stinky and so old you can see through it!?!
• If there's a cookie to be had, it's mine!
• Somehow, no matter how full you are, there's always room for ice cream:)
• People with big heads shouldn't lose too much weight.

This list is a work in progress... It's a crazy world we live in!

Playing around with a daisy pic I took... 

Cassie 

Naynay 

Sunday Night Squawk

Time: 10:42
Watching: Desperate Housewives

Yes indeed... this Sunday squawking is becoming a habit!

I've realized that I'm not a good blogger. I think I have something to say, but then it ends up sucking big time. I think it's because I know others will read it. It's like when someone suddenly turns the video camera on you and you sit there like a deer in the headlights.

I made kickass lentil soup tonight. It was so awesomely delicious, but now my gut hurts. I either ate too much or else something's a brewin' down there! Gotta be careful with those little legumes. They are small but their roar is mighty! (Kickass eh, hmmm, no pun intended!)

Anyways, it was a superb weekend! I went shopping with my pal Nancy and bought some PJ's half price! Yes, that makes a girl very happy:) And then as we chilled out with our coffees, we decided we should go for a beer (ahem, some beer). Sometimes these 'impromptu' evenings out can turn into complete debauchery... However last night was not one of those nights. Sorry, not good material for this entry. We did get quite drunk, not eating dinner before drinking can be a recipe for disaster. We were good though. The Billiard Club was not so exciting. No boys came and talked to us! It's not that we go out to meet boys, we had just chatted with each other all evening and were sick of it by then. Haha. And it's just fun to chat and goof around. We play well with others. Well, one guy chatted with us, one of the bartenders who I know from school. He's a really nice guy... It was funny because the last time we saw him we'd gone to the Billie for some "catch-up time" whereby I'd brought my journal along and was reading some of the entries to Nan. He came up to us and kept saying "we [him and the other bartender I guess] just want to read one entry, even just one paragraph... Please?" Haha. Truthfully, there's some good stories. But one paragraph isn't going to do it.

So back to last night... We decided what we needed a change of scene. What we really needed was the Dog (the Black Dog) so we headed over there and it wasn't until we were there quite a while that these guys came up to us and started chatting. It was the one guy's 23rd birthday so we chatted a while and even met their girlfriends and did shooters with all of them. Well, except the one guy was single. And when he found out that Nancy has a boyfriend, I ended up talking with him. I had a sneaking suspicion that he liked Nancy though, so I wasn't too impressed. And at the end of the night when he asked for my number, I said I'd rather take his. I wasn't sure I was interested in light of the fact that he was pretty fascinated with Nan. Besides, he's 26 and I'm trying to stay away from the young ones. It's not that you can base your judgment of someone by their age... but that's a long story for another time. Suffice it to say, I can't keep getting older and have my boyfriends stay the same age. I had quite a penchant for 22-24 year olds for a while there... And I have to quit! (Sorry D-dubya, I hope you're not reading this, but if you are I think you know that age has always been an issue with me. You're the youngest yet, though in many ways you are more mature than most guys I know!) D & I had met at the bar and yes, that night I had lied about my age, saying I was the same age as my friend who was turning 27 at the time. Oops. Dug myself a bit of a hole that night. Normally who cares what you tell someone at a bar, but since I saw him again after that it became an issue for me and I eventually had to fess up. Haha. I felt like a total heel.

Anyways, holy what a tangent I just got on. Between this squawk and my original ramble, you might think age is a big deal to me. I'd say it isn't, as most girls my age would never date younger. I try to get over that, because well, it's hard to resist sometimes! Hahaha. Besides, a lot of guys my age have really let themselves go and are pretty lame. Anyways, age isn't a good reason not to be with someone you click really well with, to a point. Venturing close to 10 years apart is pushing it a little perhaps (sorry again D). This ain't Hollywood and I sure as hell ain't Cameron Diaz. Mind you, for JT... I can't really blame her;)

Anyways, back to the story! So I got the guy's card, but I'm not going to call him. At the end of the night the ugly lights came on and we probably both got scared... So the night didn't end up being so interesting anyhow. We got Funky Pickle and headed home.

Today went to brekky with my friend Nate (yummy, and I think I was still tipsy as my half my mind was MIA) and then went to Ikea and A&B Sound with Nancy and Simon. It was crazy because all of a sudden some guys raced out of A&B and we watched and they were chasing a guy across the parking lot. I guess the guy had stolen a camcorder and had bolted. He ran and jumped into the back of a truck and it took off. Nuts!

And now the weekend and is about to end once again... hello week of hell! I hope not but I have set myself up for a tough week this week. Better force myself to bed now...

Another weekend... GONE.

God I love weekends! And today was soooo long... You gotta love a Sunday that drags on with utter lazyiness. It makes me wonder how we burn those countless hours upon hours of our lives just plugging along at work on whatever. What the F do I do all day at school? I always stay up SO late on Sunday, just not wanting the weekend to end. Once I go to sleep... bam... the weekend is over. The thing is that school isn't so bad, really. There's just so many other things I'd rather do. I have to say, though, that there's nothing better than time off after being really really productive. Everything's relative I suppose. Work hard, play hard. Hmmm... work. I'll try harder...