Martini Madness & other Stagette Shenanigans

Ah, we are in the heat of Stagette season. On that note, let me chat about my friend Chris's stagette approx. 2yrs ago now. It had to have been one of the funnest I've EVER been to.

It began with a "Martini Party"... We all brought ingredients to make our own martinis and then between all of us, we had the ingredients to make almost anything, and a LOT of booze. It was ammunition for a loaded evening!!! One part of the party was making up a martini that suited us, naming it, and then we each had to match the martini with the person who invented it. Chris's martini was "Banana Hammock", hahaha. Not sure what that infers about her... Mine was "Old Peasant." Pretty easy to pinpoint. I also made a quiz for people to do, with prizes for the winner. It's worth a looky (I put it below). After the party we dressed her up in a pink lace wedding dress we'd bought at Value Village, did a really bad job on her makeup and dragged her out to the bar. There, she had a checklist to do. Holy shit, I just followed her around laughing ALL night. Here are some of the things on her list:

Dance with two hot blondes. (She danced alright, and fell....)
Get a guy's underwear. (This was the first one she got checked off!)
Get a cute boy's phone number. (A girl offered up her husband.)
Get spanked, all the while saying, "You wanna piece of this!?" (She did this one twice, haha!)
Teach a group of people how to do 'the running man' in a pink wedding dress. (If you can imagine her doing the running man in that thing, Oh GOD, hilarious.)
Apply for the show 'Greatest Action Hero' in front of a crowd. (We won't say what she did on top of the bar for this one.)
See a cute bare butt. (Another girl offered up her boyfriend's butt for this, and we had to agree, it was very cute.)
Get shooters bought for me. (This was also checked off by a girl.)
Get ___ number of kisses on the cheek. (Uncountable.)
Do a body shot. (No problem for this one.)

That dress was BLACK by the end of the night. I laughed so hard.... So Chris, is there really going to be a re-enactment of that night during Stampede? If so, I'd better get down to Value Village next week and check out their wedding gown selection;) C'mon, we had to get the manager and barter with him to get the price down on that one from $60 to $30 (basically we pointed out that NO ONE was going to buy a pink lace wedding dress for that much.)

Hmm, I think if we start with Martini Madness again, anything can happen... (Sorry about posting this photo girky, hehe, that's what you get for putting it up on Facebook!)

Here's the martini quiz...

1. What is a Purple Hooter?
a) If Barney had boobs…
b) A small colourful owl that lives in the Rainforest.
c) Any martini made from blueish ingredients, and usually vodka or gin.
d) A martini made from vodka, raspberry liqueur, vermouth, lemon juice and sweet & sour mix.

2. How many calories do liqueurs have per ounce?
a) 100-150
b) 68-120
c) 50- 75
d) Just enough to fuel the dancing machine!

3. What is a “dirty” martini?
a) Olive brine is added to the martini.
b) The bartender does something nasty to your drink when you’re not looking.
c) Christina Aguilera invented it.
d) The martini includes a small amount of vermouth.

4. What is a “Shaker”?
a) A wild house party.
b) A stainless steel container filled with booze and ice and used to ‘shake’ the ingredients in order to cool and mix them.
c) A special type of martini that is made in a blender.
d) The term used to describe a man’s post-urination routine.

5. To “muddle” a martini, you must:
a) Take a 6-8 inch wand-like instrument and mix or crush ingredients in a container.
b) Take a 4-5 inch stirstick and stir clockwise (only twice) to blend ingredients in a martini glass.
c) Take a 8-10 inch glass wand and cast a spell on the martini you’re about to drink, to ward of ensuing hangover.
d) Make a martini and then add copious amounts of cream.

6. To make a “sour mix” for martinis and cocktails, you must:
a) Take lemon juice, add vinegar and spices, let sit overnight.
b) Add sugar to a whisked egg white, add water and lemon juice, stir and store. Yummy!
c) Just drink the martini or cocktail with a bunch of girls who all think everyone else is skinnier and prettier than them.
d) All of the above.

7. “Scoring” a martini means:
a) You batted your eyes and smiled at the bartender and he gives you one for free!
b) A specific way to sample a prepared martini so as to appreciate the full flavour, such as in a martini making contest.
c) Adding a lemon twist or lime slice or other fruit to garnish a martini.
d) Attacking a martini, American-Pie style!

Let's see how ya do... maybe I'll reveal the answers later!