If you're not going to sack it, go home and whack it... If you think she's spunky, cover your monkey... It will be sweeter if you wrap your peter... She won't get sick if you wrap your dick... If you go into heat, package your meat... Cuff your carrot before you share it...
Err, that wasn't quite what I meant, but it got your attention didn't it!? I was actually referring to the impending Valentine's Day of course (the stores are already shoving it down our throats) ... And yeah, every year I make the SAME joke. Is it getting old yet?
John Lennon said, "We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant.... You've got to keep watering it. You've got to really look after it and nurture it."
The problem is that a lot of people suck at caring for plants! They don't water it until they finally notice that it's wilting, about to enter that botanical garden in the sky, going leaf to leaf with the greenery grim reaper. Then they drown the thing in an attempt to bring it back from that kind of action. This attempted drowning is akin to Valentine's Day.
C'mon folks, just water your plants REGULARLY. We don't need a commercial holiday (especially one that doesn't come with a day off) to remind us to take care of our love lives... and at the same time make both singles and couples all over the world feel like losers because no one can live up to the hype.
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5 comments:
i never water my plants. We have dead plants all over the house.
As for my relationship, well luckily I am not as negligent.
Yeah, I guess it was just an analogy. I also know of people who are excellent with plants but not so good with people. Haha.
Continuing with that analogy though... I'm not sure if anyone should take relationship advice from me. I see the first little sign of a slightly wilting leaf -> and get out the FIRE HOSE.
"Oh no, I just blew another one off the shelf. Darnit, now there are leaves, dirt and water everywhere..."
Oopsie daisy.
hahahahaha!
good one.
Who leaves dead plants all over the house, Rosie, just throw them out and get new ones. Goog analogy Squish.
I don't throw them out and get new ones!
Oh, you weren't still talking about the analogy, were you?
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