Bedtime

My sister gave me some fleece sheets for my birthday. Yep, they're FLEECE.

Yet I still avoid going to bed for some reason. But at least when I do, it's like crawling into a GIANT COTTON BALL. Aahhh YES.

In fact, it's not cotton at all. It's polyethylene terephthalate. (Say that once really fast.) Doesn't it sound scrumptiously comfy! Hmm, not particularly.

According to Wikipedia, polar fleece is "soft, very comfortable to wear... extremely warm even with a relatively thin layer of material." Alternatively, it also says that "users have a tendency to sweat in fleece, as it is an artificial fibre... It tends to generate very high static electricity charges."

Hmm. I'm wondering when this will occur. Hasn't yet.

So how am I not sweating when the fabric is considered "extremely warm"? And what happens when you're sitting in a pool of perspiration and move and a bolt of static shoots from the sheets? Does sweat conduct electricity cuz I'm starting to get a bit worried here.

I'm also thinking I'd better not move in those sheets and fart at the same time. Unless of course they've been treated with some fire retardant material. In which case I'm going to be dead soon anyways as that stuff is mega-toxic!

Oh geez, now I have a good reason to avoid going to bed!

Well, shite. I MUST get some sleep. Alright, I'm off to the "cotton" ball now. Gotta try real hard not to sweat, move, fart or breathe... or at least, not all at once. Could happen.