You didn't just EAT that...

I get a bit giddy when I successfully sucker people in with a practical joke. A while ago I got a great idea for a joke, but hadn’t executed it… Until NOW. Wah ha ha ha ha ha!

I always thought that refried black beans look just like poo. And I thought that putting them in some sort of cake decorating tube and squeezing it out into a coiler on the floor would be an awesome practical joke. And get this, a couple of nights ago I was eating Mexican food and my roommate wasn’t home yet… Opportunity knocks!

Well, I couldn’t find any kind of a cake tube so I had to improvise with saran wrap and ended up making a fairly convincing-looking log on the floor in front of the fridge. It had to be just right because my roomie works at a vet clinic and would be able to spot a fakie a mile away. I went and sat back at my computer when she arrived home. It took a few minutes for her to notice, and then (paraphrasing from what I remember):

D: What is that? Is that a joke? Did one of the cats… is that throw-up or poo???? What is it!!!???
Me: What the? Where?

I get up to check out the scene. Of course, I already know what I"m about to find. She’s still going on about what it might be.

D: It looks too big for poo…

[Dammit!]

Me: Oh man, that looks like poo to me. Eewww!

I lean down and sniff at it.

Me: Hmmmm. I can't smell if it's poo...

I’m still bent over inspecting it and then I reach down and scoop a little bit off with my finger and put it up to my nose to smell it.

Me: Hmmm… doesn’t really smell like poo.

The whole time she was watching I couldn’t look at her, which is too bad because I would have LOVED to see the look on her face after the next part.

Then I licked it off my finger.

D: You didn’t just EAT that…

At this point she starts to laugh and I’m starting to giggle a little too.

Me: Hmmm. It doesn’t taste like poo.

Just as she’s at the height of disbelief, I reach down, grab the whole log, pick it up and take a bite out of it.

Me: Actually, it tastes like refried beans!!!!

By this time she was actually ON THE GROUND laughing. I was laughing too. She told me that when I touched it and smelled my finger, she didn’t think that was TOO weird because her sister makes her smell things all the time… but when I tasted it, oh my.

I still laugh every time I hear her words in my head, "You didn't just EAT that…"