What is it with packaging these days? I thought there was a trend to reducing packaging at one point there, but now it seems that it needs to be some kind of an impenetrable fortress. Half the time I can’t even open this plastic shit without having to go get a hacksaw! The worst is definitely that moulded plastic stuff. I guess, if nothing else, at least if there was ever a natural disaster or war that wiped out most of the planet, there would still be plenty of make-up and cable cords intact and ready for use by the struggling survivors.
You see, I always try to get that last little bit of product out of the bottom of any dispenser, whether it be shampoo or body lotion, because that pump thing never gets all of it. And there’s usually a good weeks worth of product in there, and well, I’m not only anti-waste but also a student, so every penny counts. Plus when we’re talking about RoC's new patented technology, a daily moisturiser that helps to counteract the effects of melanin and uneven skin complexion (hence $$$)… I NEED to use every little ounce of the stuff. This morning the pump was pumping no more. No problem, I thought, just get the lid open… but it was securely sealed from top to bottom! Bastards! Still not a problem… with a grin and the intent to make a nice slice across its midsection, I got out my oh-so-sharp donttouchitcuzitwillliterallysliceyourfingerrightoffya Leatherman blade. Guess what happened next? I almost sliced my fricken finger off!!! I tried slicing, stabbing and constant pressure techniques. Nuthin. My persistence turned into frustration. Dammit, I HAVE to get at that stuff in there!!!
A HATCHET! I need to find myself a hatchet. My complexion is slowly but surely getting a visibly uneven, unluminous tone.
… I could just admit defeat and go to the store. But I’m gonna beat this thing. I am. You’ll see. You’re mine illusive face lotion, you’re mine!
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2 comments:
Hey, your obviously YOUNG and RESORCEFUL. Think of us old feeble folks!
Even our medicines are unobtainable! Did anyone ever think that a bottle that was child proof was also "second chidhood" proof. Some of the inhaler dispensers you need to be a genius to remember the program to gain access(turn it clockwise until it clicks, then push this button, pull this leaver, breath out all the way, place your mouth over this hole, suck in hard, wash your mouth out with water, and then rotate this thing counterclockwise until it clicks). Now did you get all that? See, and you don't even have Alzheimers.
Sorry, I have to quit now and get my inhaler. I'm out of breath and need to figure it out.
OK then A-1.
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