I looked at the weather forecast that always pops up on my computer whenever I log on… it says one word: “Haze”. That’s exactly how I feel today. Uncanny. How did they know?
How do cords get so messed up? Today I put my mp3 player, my camera cord and another adapter cord in my bag, separately, and they all came out in one big tangled clump. What the hell happened in there over the last few hours, some kickass game of ‘cord twister’???
I have weird odds and ends in my fridge right now… so for lunch I quickly grabbed a piece of leftover frozen pizza and some peas. Strange, I know. Hey, why is it that TV pizza looks so disgusting? I’m not talking about the Pizza Hut ads, even though that looks pretty gross to me and I loooooove pizza. I’m referring to the pizzas they have on sitcoms… looks like soggy cardboard with some tomato sauce slapped on it. Freakin’, why not just get a real pizza? Then the actors wouldn't have to act so hard when eating it. You can tell they're trying not to actually bite into it, if they even eat it at all. Most of the time it's a happy scene too, they're passing around the pizza, laughing and chatting and having a grand ol' time. I certainly wouldn't be happy, I'd be pissed. Who the hell ordered the tomato sauce flavored cardboard??? Which one of you bastards told them to hold ALL the toppings please?!
Speaking of ads, I can’t remember where I saw it… maybe SNL, where they say, “Who were the ad wizards who came up with that one?” In fact, it's Adam Sandler’s voice saying it in my mind. Anyways, that quote goes through my head a lot when I watch or hear commercials. A LOT. One in particular comes to mind right now, that stupid fricken' maxipad pinball commercial. What the?
Jen came by before the seminar today and was waiting for me to finish up. “I’m coming, I’m coming!!!” I cried, to which she replied, “You aren’t coming fast enough!” I just can't let that sort of thing go. “That’s what all the boys tell me… so then I have to fake it.” Her reaction, as always, “Why why why do you have to do that every time?” Aw, sweet girl she is. She says I should have a sign on the office door that says “PG 17.” Jen, perhaps it should be PG 25?
I told her that I wrote a blog before the seminar… I got an idea and just had to get it over with so I could focus on work after that. It’s kind of like that whole chocolate cake or tub of Haagen Dasz... you know, the one you decide to wolf down in its entirety just to get it over with and therefore not be distracted by it anymore. Yeah, that's it, that's the ticket...
I sit down in the seminar and look at the desktop of the girl beside me. Of course there was scribbling all over it. One 'scribble' in particular caught my eye and as offensive as it was, I still had to laugh. It said, "Big Hairy Vagina-->" and pointed straight at my lap. Ahem. Uncanny. How did they know?
5 comments:
LOL.... I just saw a spoof on Rick Mercer's Report tv show that was hilarious. "It's not frozen, it's Delivery-Os." It was hilarious.... still partially frozen and damp. Now available in hot dog and cheese toppings.
Rick Mercer has funny commercials. Sometimes I don't know they are commercials and I am thinking what Mich was thinking.
Mich, I might have been the one to write "big hairy vagina" with arrow on the desk. I wouldn;t put it past me.
How did they know? Maybe they discovered you naked in their shower where you had collapsed. Maybe your fears (from previous blog) stem from some sort of suppressed reality! Hahaha.
I admit that I AM in denial, that's about the only thing I'm not in denial about.
Yes Rose, I wouldn't put it past you... but you'd think I'd remember that as undoubtedly I would've been sitting beside you when you wrote that... And we would have been cracking up. Ah the old days. It's pretty bad, me reminiscing about the old days when I'M STILL THERE!!! Yikes. I think I'll blog about our stupid stats class...
Oh, stats! yes, do blog. I might do an adjoint blog about the horrible torturous semester that was statistics.
*shudder*
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