April Fool's Day... Make Someone Smile:)

I realize that anything I say on April 1st is suspect. People know me too well. However, like I said in the last comments, I did NOT play any jokes last year on April Fool’s Day!!! This is because I think AFD is like Valentine's Day, they’re designated days when you have free reign to act like a fool but you could (and should) have fun all year 'round with both concepts.

I don’t know how I ended up as a practical joker; because everything I did that was halfway non-serious as a kid, I got in trouble for. I put mashed potatoes on my uncle’s chair and he sat in it-- deep shit. I tripped my older brother’s friend as he walked by and he went flying down the stairs-- deep shit. I put water on a maxi pad and slapped it on my little brother’s head-- deep deep shit. Don’t ask me why I thought that was a funny thing to do, although I was laughing until I got in trouble for it. The fact is, I always got in shit for joking around. Goofing off or giggling anywhere/anytime, especially at bedtime, the dinner table or on road trips was grounds for-- deep shit.

Anyways, somehow I got to like the ol’ joking around business. Mind you, now that I think about it, my mom had a few jokes up her sleeves. She used to get us kids every AFD by waking us up in the morning in a panic saying the school bus was waiting for us. We’d race out of bed and grab our bags only to find: NO BUS. My brothers have also pulled fast ones on me... one evening I was exhausted and fell asleep on the couch. At around 7pm they woke me up and told me it was 7am and I'd better start getting ready for school. I wandered around in a confused daze for at least half an hour before I realized what was happening. I guess the lesson there is that it's good to get people when they're still half asleep!!! My sister has also been a good example, a few years ago she bought a remote control farting machine that proved to be hours and hours of laughter. I got one too eventually. One day I brought it to work. I placed it under Vanessa’s desk chair in the lab, and as the senior technologist was walking by her desk, I set it off from where I was sitting. I could see him jerk his head to look at her and then speed off out of the lab.

So usually when AFD comes along, I have to pull out a few tricks of the trade. In the past, I’ve called my mom to tell her I was pregnant. Another year I told some friends I got back together with my ex. Wow, that made them mad! A couple of year’s ago, I have to admit that I didn’t plan it, but I was ON FIRE. I spent the whole morning (uh not working) playing joke after joke. Anyways, on email/msn I told a couple of my friends that my supervisor called a lab meeting. I told them that it had been in the works for a while, but he was taking a job in Adelaide, Australia!!! I explained that I could either finish up my work here, and hopefully he could come back for my defense OR I could actually arrange it so I could go with him!!! They were pretty excited for me. Where's Adelaide? Well, just south of Impullinyerleg and west of Urasucka!!! That morning I also called my friend Lisa and told her that our Juno tickets got stolen out of my desk at work. I got my Vanessa good too when I stuck a fake ‘hanger’ in my nose (it dangles down about 3 inches) and pretended to sneeze and ran around the lab screaming, "Where's a Kleenex? I need a Kleenex!!!" She was REALLY grossed out!

Definitely the easiest tools for AFD are email and instant messages though. There isn’t the pressure to keep a straight face because you can be laughing the whole time and the other person is none the wiser. And you can trick so many people at the same time, even hundreds of miles away!

I get my friend Chris every year on msn (hehehe, sorry Girky)!!! The 'on fire' year I got her REAL GOOD. I was to be Chris’s Maid of Honor in her wedding later that summer... Here's an excerpt from the conversation that day (btw, we call each other ‘girk’… it was a typo for ‘girl’ that stuck):

I says: hey girk... i was gonna call you last night. It turns out that my cousin is getting married the long weekend in august, so i don't know what to do... she asked me to be in the wedding party
I says: girk?
I says: hey girky!!! July 31st? That weekend??? oh man - do what you want girk!! I understand
I says: its not that i WANT tho, its that i feel obligated
Bealer says: whatever you choose!
I says: shite, this is a tough one. and its in winnipeg too, so i can't even try to do both!!!
Bealer says: hey girk, I understand
I says: unless.... tell me what you think of this...
Bealer says: oh no! hahahah
I says: SUCKA!!!!!! HAPPY APRIL FOOL'S DAY!!!!! man i get you every year don't i, hehehehehe
i love it
Bealer says: you do get me!
I says: heeheehee
Bealer says: EVERY F***ING YEAR. what a - why I not just outta, I am GONNA!!!
I says: HAHAHAHA i'm laughing pretty hard right now
I says: man, you were really nice about it too
Bealer says: well I felt so bad! And I totally understood!! not yer fault
I says: hahaha thanks girk, you made my morning
Bealer says: LOL - I just told everyone here - I guess you made their morning too!!!
I says: hahaha
Bealer says: oh man , you GOT ME SOOO GOOOD. they were like, what are you cursing at?? LOL

Then I just continued with other people on my msn list… Next was a mutual friend of my bud Nancy, who was in Asia traveling at the time…

I says: so did you hear about nancy???
She says: no? what?
I says: all her shit got stolen, ALL OF IT
She says: WHAT
She says: WHERE?
I says: she's got one set of clothes, that she was wearing last night
She says: oh no
I says: in vietnam
She says: how did you find this out?
I says: simon was telling me last night
She says: so her passport and money too?
I says: all that shit
She says: f***, is she devastated?
I says: holy fack
She says: did she leave it in the hostel?
I says: she has to come back
She says: happens a lot. she has to get a passport first
I says: yeah she was gonna go to the embassy last i heard, the canadian embassy or something
She says: f***, how stressful
She says: what a bad way to end everything
I says: i haven't heard much since
She says: she doesnt really HAVE to come back
I says: i feel terrible for her
She says: me too, that sucks
I says: well, i think she's fed up, didn't like vietnam to start with
She says: thats awful. she must have left it in her guesthouse and went out. f***, what about her ticket home?
I says: she's just cutting it short by aoubt two months i guess, she was planning on coming back in june or so eh
She says: might be able to re-issue that. yeah, June
I says: i don't know, i never thought of that!!!
She says: That sucks, people who steal suck
I says: yeah, people that trick people suck too. Hehehe. april fools sucka!!!!
She says: hahahhahah good one!!!! I totally fell for it!!!
I says: HAHAHA, me laughing... HARD
She says: HAHAHAHHAA so you should be
She says: I am an idiot
I says: you are my 4th victim this morning
She says: HAHAHAA, I got my sister but that was it, good one
I says: hahaha, too funny. anyways, thanks for that. it was very fun
She says: hahahha, you'll get yours

... I figure if I can get someone to drop the F-bomb that many times, I must be doing pretty good!!!


Then I got a girl who is a mutual friend of Rose’s…

I says: hey, did you hear about rose???
She says: what's that?
I says: oops, maybe i shouldn't say… ah well, you'll find out soon enough
I says: her and des are gonna be parents!!!!
I says: cool eh
She says: shut up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! holy shit
She says: how far along is she?
I says: yeah, act like you don't know tho
She says: f***!!!!!!! it'
She says: it's april fools!!!!!!!!!!
I says: about 3 mos now
oh… yeah
I says: sucka
hahahaha
She says: lol
She says: you really had me!!!!!
I says: HAHA cool!!!
She says: i was racking my brain.... too funny...thanks for the smile....you're the only person that's tried today...anyone get you?
I says: HAHA uh, no but you're my 6th victim
hehehehe
I says: geez, this has been a really fun morning