9. Making any kind of decision about ANYTHING is impossible for her, and this incessant indecisiveness is bloody annoying to everyone involved... especially her. Ok maybe it annoys you more. No, it's really more aggravating to her. Or you. Oh GEEZ I have no idea WHO THE F IT'S WORSE FOR (and I don't give a crap either)!!!!!
8. She cries at what may seem TO YOU like nothing, but don't you dare infer that it's nothing! That old song, her nail breaking, the Oprah show... it's not nothing and it's not the PMS either dammit!
7. She has zits in sizes, shapes, numbers and/or places you never knew was humanly possible.
6. She's bloated up so much that she resembles a blow-up Buddha doll, and has to complain about and/or show you how big her belly is intermittently throughout the day. Then she heads back to the couch... with her giant-sized chocolate bar, bowl of ice cream topped with a brownie and chocolate sauce and her cup of hot chocolate.
5. She lies awake with a head full of lists. "To do." "Wish I'd done." "Why the hell did I do that?"
4. One minute she wants to rip your head off and the next she wants to rip your clothes off.
3. You get nasty texts/emails/phone calls from her, perhaps even death threats. She has to freak out on you about some (or every) aspect of the relationship (and her memory becomes incredibly long for these things as well, but you must have 'set it off' with something you did recently). The translation is actually very simple boys: I need some attention from you! (And it should be attention in the way she wants it, when she wants it, exactly as it plays out in her head or you're dead buddy. You just are.)
2. You notice her constantly swearing at or throwing inanimate objects. Tolerance level has become negative NIL. Her motto for dealing with most "situations" with objects has become: If it's stuck, force it. If it breaks, it needed fixing anyways. (Strangely enough, Murphy's Law tends to rear it's ugly head A LOT during this special time of month.)
1. Happy Bunny becomes a personal mission statement... Now go suck someplace else you moron.


6 comments:
Now that was funny...or not...depending on what you were going for. Really, I didn't mean it that way.. I'm just trying to help.. Oh hon, don't cy.. I hate myself.
Deej
I would think if your girlfried had pms you'd be more understanding of her, you being a woman and all . . .
Or she decides to start a blog by the name of "Ramblings of a whiner", or if she already has one, decides to blog an entry! But isn't that PMS thing supposed to be at a certain time of the month and only ONCE a month?
Holy hell that was funny ... I think I hurt myself a little laughing so hard
Amen sista ... amen
and YOU ... stop looking at me funny ... or you're gonna get it!
Oh! Not nice. Painfully accurate, maybe, but still, you gonna get it.
Great blog. :-)
Thanks Princess! Glad you can relate... or maybe not so glad, I feel your pain.
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