Camping with Nerds

No, that's not the name of a geek-supercharged survivor-type reality TV show (like Jen's dad thought;)... but it was definitely my reality last weekend when I went to Jasper with some of the people from my research group. Looking at the photos below though, guess who was the biggest fashion nerd of the trip? Ok, so I use camping as an excuse to wear whatever clothes I have left in my closet from the early 1990's. It makes for a very flattering ensemble I must say.

We saw a lot of wildlife (sheep, elk, squirrels, coyotes), but no bears. However, we were warned at the gate that it was elk rutting season and to keep clear (at least 3 bus lengths). People still went within one bus length to take their pictures, despite the distinct possibility of being bred by a very large bull elk, or perhaps worse, having him tear you another asshole with his huge rack of antlers. Real bright folks, real bright.

My two tentmates thought they'd be smart and wear earplugs and eye masks so they could sleep at night. At first when I lay there in the middle of the night listening to eerie elk mating calls and then got woken up by yipping squirrels in the morning, I thought maybe they were onto something and that earplugs were a good idea. Then common sense kicked in. I think I'd wanna hear if there was some kind of kafuffle outside or worse, some animal trying to get inside the tent at night. Yeah, I think I'd rather have fair warning. Those two happy sleep-nerds can be bait for the bear while I high tail it outta there!!!

Although there was a lot of wildlife, there was nothing wild about our campsite. Jasper National Park lets everyone know that 'quiet time' is after 10pm and the campers at our site definitely took it literally. It took about 10 minutes of 9 people staring at the fire in silence for me to pipe up.

"Ok then... if no one is going to talk then I'll be forced to tell jokes."

Still nuthin.

I tried to pressure people to drink.

Nuthin.

I started it with one of my fave jokes I first heard my brother tell many years ago about the two golfers and the old lady taking a dump in the trees. Then I mentioned the email I got about the Bobbit sister and how she missed her hubbie's thang and got charged with a 'misdeweiner'. Of course I had to tell the one about the really dumb guy that got married and told his dad the next day after his wedding night that "the way she was acting, I think I totally coulda gotten laid last night!" After a few more, I ended it with one that someone told me may not have been appropriate for this crowd. What? I only mention a certain body part, nothing obscene about that... Oh yeah, I'm camping with nerds!!! Ok here it is...

Tarzan was swinging through the trees and he saw a beautiful girl. So he swings up to her and says: What name?
She says: Jane.
He says: What whole name?
She says: Vagina.

In the original version, a much more vulgar word was used and I think the word I used was totally acceptable.

There was a little bit of laughing and then more silence.

More pressure on my end for them to drink. Nuthin.

My supervisor told some bear stories and a couple of his own jokes.

More silence. No one wanted another drink.

At midnight they called it a night. My first and last weekend of camping and official last weekend of summer, ended at midnight with a perfectly good fire still blazing and two half bottles of wine sitting on the picnic table.

Oh well. I tried. They were a good crew overall and the trip rocked. Jasper is beautiful, the food was good (I'm sure nutrition students bring totally different food camping than the general population... i.e. turkey and veggie dogs, lots and lots of vegetables, yogourt, muesli.... oh and s'mores of course!).


Yeah yeah yeah, I know that outfit ain't flattering!

Check out the scenery... the one day it was raining and you can see the drops in the picture. Waterfalls are always awesome, and I tried to capture the full moon one night. You can see me starting the fire with ease in one shot. And in the pic of the mountain sheep by the road you can tell that they're either totally illiterate or they just don't care about park rules-- the sign behind them says: "Reclamation area, do not disturb."

That's it until next year... And probably my last whole weekend off for a while if I ever wanna finish school. Me = one sad camper.