Saturday, January 20, 2007

Can't do anything right...

This article had me cracking up. Perhaps it just struck me in exactly the right way that day.


Study: Depression Hits Losers Hardest

The Onion

Study: Depression Hits Losers Hardest

PALO ALTO, CA-According to a report released Monday by Stanford's Institute For Psychotherapeutic Study, depression, America's leading mental illness, hits losers worse than any other segment of society.



I don't know... It's pretty harsh. I suppose that's satire for ya. But parts of it were funny, this bit in particular:

"The depressed patient suffers from severe, delusional feelings of worthlessness," the study read. "But through therapy, the majority of those people are able to overcome their depression by slowly discovering that these negative beliefs are not true. In the case of losers, however, such negative self-images are not delusional, but instead reflect the truth about their lack of worth. This makes the loser's chances of suffering depression far more likely, and their prognosis for recovery slim to none."

I myself, tend to run in the opposite direction. If I wasn't delusional, perhaps I'd be more depressed! Dammit, I'm no loser! Ah well, optimism keeps me hoping that people will love me anyways.

"The supreme happiness in life is the conviction that we are loved -- loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves." -Victor Hugo

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hello Mitchie,

It is I. The Florentine, suitably impaired but still literate and hopefully rational.

The banker I think has finally left me. She was exquisite, but too conservative. As fate would have it I met this very evening, another British woman who smelled of Rochas.

The mink was black. She had spotted me a few evenings before, and tonight she spoke. I love them, the hunters.

I hope you are well. I like your new look, and I hope you have something suitable to say me.

Life is good in this great eastern metropolis. It has more than one airport, and more than one official language.

Goodnight Cher

Anonymous said...

Your "pie" only adds up to 100%. Most people belong in all the categories-----so I've been told-----of course I don't know any of them-----they probably are just fine people-----of course they are great people----you shouldn't make fun of the infirm!!!! Aaahhhh. Thank g-d the prozac is finally kicking in.

michie said...

You're right anonymous! At least many of them are overlapping, or perhaps some exacerbate the others. Hmm, you sound like a real geek. Good reason to be a little depressed, I'd say.

As for you Mr. Flourentine (I figure if you can spell my name wrong, then I have justification to go to town on yours)... thanks for the update. I always enjoy reading about your escapades, especially when they are impaired and brief. Hmmm, I guess that probably wasn't "something suitable" to say to you, but then nothing ever is on this blog. Sorry about that. I hope you got lucky with that smelly Brit. Cheers!